We have been clearing out my mom’s apartment the past two days. We continue today. For those who are catching this blog for the first time, my mother passed away on April 2. I am in Florida. Clearing out her apartment is probably the hardest part of this journey. Yet, it is a holy act.
I was just here two months ago, doing this with my mom because she had just moved again. It was hard for her to let go of anything. She had just downsized for the second time, and it was necessary. I spent a lot of that time trying to convince her that she wasn’t throwing things away, but giving them to some else who could use them. Still, she resisted and, of course, I relented. I did my best to remain respectful and loving.
So, here I am, two months later, forced into giving her possessions away and yes, throwing out all those things she would not let go of in February. They are in the same place, stuffed in drawers and closets. Is there a parent’s museum somewhere where all children can display their parents keepsakes, those things that they, their children, cannot keep?
Yes, it is a holy act and when I begin each day, I say a prayer. My prayer is that as I release each item – clothes or kitchen ware or even a card that she kept – that I am releasing her to her next adventure, her next expansion. I am also letting go of her in the form that I knew her. So, this is the way I look at it. Otherwise, I would feel that I am somehow dishonoring her. It is a constant process of breathing, treating and centering.
And, of course, it brings me to my own life. I must continue to release all that doesn’t serve me. I must continue to release anything that covers my magnificence and beauty and true Spirit. Whether it be a judgement, a belief in lack and limitation, a feeling of ill toward myself or anyone, I release it.
Yesterday, while I was cleaning, I sang to myself Ricky Byers’ song: “I release and I let go. I let the spirit run my life. And my heart is open wide. I’m only here for God. “
I continue this holy act today.
Letting Go with Love and Aloha,