Is it true? Is it kind? Is it necessary? These are the three questions I have asked myself as of late when deciding if I should say something or have a conversation with another person. Sometimes something might be true, but it is not kind. Sometimes it might feel necessary, but it might not be kind.
Truth is the first for me. Also, it must be my truth. Something might have occurred and the other person is totally oblvious to what occurred for me. They didn’t mean anything by a comment, but something about it struck me and needed to be tended to. So, is it true doesn’t necessary mean it is true for everyone. I must come from myself.
Is it kind? I believe I am always kind. However, what does being kind really mean? We might have a conversation where we want to be transparent and truthful with someone else or a group of people and it might come across as unkind. I think it is all about intention. Was my intention kind? Was I just being truthful because I had to be truthful and transparent about my feelings? I think we know the difference between being kind and saying something just to strike out at another person. Do I feel defensive or am I just truthfully stating what is on my mind that I want to bring clarity to?
Is it necessary? This is a big one for me? When do I remain silent and when is it that I am justified in speaking my mind, knowing it is necessary that I do so? For me, I think that it comes after I have sat with the issue. I must come to some kind of resolution in my own mind before I speak. This might take a moment. That’s why, for me, it is so important to wait and digest and pray about a conflict before I bring it before the other person. I want to make sure it isn’t just my ego speaking. I’ve always been one of these people who doesn’t say things in the moment. Then, I go home and fester about it. Why didn’t I say this or that? Well, I’ve come to find out that this is a strength. Taking it in and working with it within oneself is the place to start.
I believe that there is a final part to these three questions and that is if the silence will serve the situation best. This answer comes to me if I will take the time to ask myself the three previous questions and really get real with myself.
I also know that the most powerful thing, for me, is to ask myself if I am in victimhood. Am I taking responsibility for my own feelings first. What I know is that we are always Divinely guided and that if we will just get quiet and tap into our intuition, we will know exactly whether to speak or not to speak in every experience.