Yesterday, was the best day and the worst day at the same time. I was so grateful to find out that everyone who I had contact with had tested negative. This is such a blessing. I am so grateful. In the same breath, I went through a downward shame spiral about myself. “Why me?” was the question that pounded me. “I’m always so healthy.”
Today, one of my best friends just laughed when I asked the question, “You’re the only one who could take it,” he said so nonchalantly with a chuckle. He went on with the conversation planning an event with me that we would share together next week.
Why do we ask these questions? As I wrote yesterday, they have no answer, really. The only thing that truly matters is now and how we will proceed. Still these, what I call “witch hunts,” still creep into the consciousness. Yesterday, when this downward spiral began, I called my husband for Treatment. A shift almost immediately took place and I just let go and surrendered to the “not knowing.” All there is for me to do is to trust and faith at times like these.
So, today, I feel physically really good. I’ll still take it easy, but I actually feel up to some work today. Mentally, I am relaxed and at peace. What is my biggest takeaway today? Stop thinking so much! Take a deep breath and relax into it. Dr. Ernest Holmes used to advise his ministers to “relax into it” when they were apprehensive about giving talks. This advice can be taken any time one feels challenged by something or when one feels that things are a bit too much to digest. Just relax into a Power that is greater than all of this stuff in the world of form. It does catch us and carry us through. Its gift is peace of mind. I’m feeling a lot of peace of mind today.
Love and Aloha,
Rev. Rita Andriello-Feren